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"BLOGGING ALONG" with Joyce Knock

Walk with me on my journey!

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grief

Grieving alone.

Excerpt from my book

My Heart Is Broken

A journey of loss grief and hope

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Doesn’t Anyone Care Anymore

In the days and weeks following Levi’s death our mailbox was filled with cards of sympathy and consolation.  The donations in Levi’s memory were overwhelming.  Our home was filled with caring people drifting in and out offering support and encouraging us to stay engaged with others.

The onslaught of well-wishers and busyness buffered our grief and temporarily cushioned us from our new reality.

As I struggled through lonely days I became painfully aware that others appeared to be going about their lives just as they had prior to Levi’s death.  Why weren’t they as sad as I was?

Why?  Why?  Why?

Gradually, I realized something I knew all along.  All these ‘others’ had their lives to live and their journeys to take.                      ###

 

 

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Time is valuable..why give it away?

time

For the past 2-1/2 years I have been    volunteering at the Women’s Prison at Mitchellville in the General Population Library. I describe my position as an ‘overseer of the women’ who need no direction from me to  operate the library.    My presence  however does make it possible for the library to be open on Sunday afternoon as no prison  employees supervise or work in the library ever ……it is run completely by the women currently living there.  Working in the library is a coveted position in the prison and currently pays about 50 cents/hour.  As a volunteer I am the only person who can answer the phone, make calls to reception to share library hours, call security for opening and closure,  and make  calls to summon women who have books to pick up.  The women who work in the library are skilled librarians…capable to answer questions about books, authors, and subjects.

I have worked with some of the women for almost 2-1/2 years now and we have developed a unique respectful relationship.  There is much we can not share but there is much we can talk about  and discuss that has made our relationships unique and special.  One thing I do know is that I look forward to spending time with them  twice monthly for 2 hours and engaging in conversation with them about a variety of topics.  Being an inmate  has not diminished or robbed them of their ability to think, have opinions are ability to discuss a variety of issues.

One of the greatest benefits I receive each Sunday is an opportunity to ‘get out of myself’ and give some time to someone else which forces  me to not dwell on thoughts or concerns that might currently be troubling me.  It is amazing what these two hours of volunteering and one hour of driving time can do for my heart and soul…it is great therapy and for that I am thankful.

Until two weeks from now when I drive to the prison, enter the prison, pass through security, walk up the long hill to the library and I am greeted by these library women workers who no doubt will say, ‘How are you Miss Joyce?’  It doesn’t get any better!    ###

 

 

 

A Little Bout A Lotta Things 

 

My blogs to date have covered a variety of topics.  This shall continue to be my style as I am a multi dimensional person as are my readers.

img_4228My third published book is entitled ‘My heart is broken. A journey of loss, hope and grief.’ Many of us have experienced the loss of a loved one. Understanding and accepting our common experience I will share the introduction of my book laying the groundwork for the writings that will follow.

Dear fellow sojourner,

I understand that I do not have the market on grief due to the loss of a loved one. After futile attempts to cope with my sorrow I started putting my feelings on paper making my grief visible. It allowed me to bear my pain, my broken heart and a soul that is often times empty.

On this journey, we have the right to grieve, to cry, to sob and to grow from the choices we make each day. If you are on a similar journey I invite you to walk with me. Hopefully, as we mourn our loss and feel the pain, our brokenness will be mended.

Together we may feel less alone.

Respectfully yours,

Joyce Knock

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What’s your time worth?

time

 

I invite you  to consider some thoughts about time.  Within the past two years I have experienced the loss of a loved one in my family.  This loss was crushing to my soul and at times I felt like I was lost and in a black hole.  However, MANY people gave me some of their time to sit with me, listen to me and cry with me as my soul was healing.  Their time was valuable and yet they were  sharing something they could never get back.  It was the greatest gift of all.

In my lifetime I have shared my time volunteering in a variety of ways. In early marriage it  was  supervising a cub scout unit…and no, I didn’t have any boys…I didn’t have any kids.  Like many of you I volunteered when my children were in school as a home room mother.  In later years I have and continue to volunteer at the Women’s Prison in Mitchellville, at the Ronald McDonald House, as a CASA [Court Appointed Special Advocate for Children] and as a  mentor with the Drake Literacy Program.   These experiences have given back to me more than I could ever have given to them.  I have found that when I do something with and for others it frees me from focusing too much on myself.  It provides me an opportunity to engage in someone else’s life and not spent too much time dwelling on what I might consider my woes and worries in life.  It is healing.  It is TIME WELL SPENT!

I invite  you to think about how you spent your time.  Consider the time that others have given you and what you given to others.  Ask yourself.  Do I like the way I have spent my time?   ###

 

A painful book to write!

Over the past months I have been writing my 3rd book.  It has been a difficult book to write and yet oftentimes very comforting.  I am sharing the cover and first page of my book and I am inviting you to review it and make comments! 

My heartbroken-heart is broken.

A journey of loss, grief and hope.

Respectfully yours!

I respectfully understand that I do not have the market on grief due to the loss of a loved one.  However, putting my journey on paper has allowed me to bear my pain, my broken heart and a soul that is oftentimes empty.

If you are on a similar journey I invite you to walk with me.  Together we may feel less alone.

On your journey accept your  need and right to grieve, to cry – to sob!

I encourage you to experience your loss and sadness as you learn to grow from the choice you make on your journey.

Let’s walk together.

Just what I needed!

 Spent a very FUN day at the “Reading Between The Vines” author event at the Snus  Winery yesterday.    The rural setting was so calming and peaceful to me and it reminded me of “growing up” on an Iowa farm! 

 Of the 25 authors present I had met only a handful prior to the event.  Such fun exchanges meeting so many statewide authors!! Had a successful selling day, conversing with other authors and visitors to the winery and book event….and enjoyed some wine…”Catnip”..was  my favorite! 

Driving home from the winery area I deliberately choose a relaxing and peaceful route through the countryside.  It was the best therapy for me!! I was  so calm and relaxed!! My return journey home seemed to reconnect me with my rural Iowa upbringing..it was calming and also exhilarating!  And it was so MOTIVATING!! How?? I set as my goal to “finish” a work in progress….my 3rd children’s book entitled “My goldfish died.  I am so sad!” which addresses the issue of loss, sadness and grief. It is time to finish it!!! I can do it!!

Grateful  for such a wonderful day!     ###

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